Stop Making Excuses and Start REALLY LIVING!

Jun 2, 2024

Stop Making Excuses 

Look, we’ve all been there.

We’ve all made excuses when things didn’t go our way, when we fell short of our goals or aspirations.

It’s easy, isn’t it — to shift the blame and delude ourselves into thinking it’s not our fault?

Excuse making is a quick and convenient way to avoid taking responsibility for our failures and shortcomings.

But here’s the harsh truth: Excuses are NOT your friend.

Although they seem like a helpful escape route in the moment, in reality they’re your ENEMY.

They slowly poison your potential and sabotage your growth. . .

Every excuse is a little white lie we tell ourselves to stay in our little comfort zone, to avoid the pain of honest self-reflection and the hard work of self-improvement.

They’re a drug that provides temporary relief but ultimately makes us sicker.

And the more we indulge in them, the harder it becomes to break the habit and face reality on reality’s terms.

Identical female twins, one covering the mouth of the other with her hand

Victimhood Is Holding You Back

Every time you make excuses and blame others for your lack of progress or success, you reinforce the belief that you’re a victim of circumstance with no control over your life.

Which is nonsense.

It’s a black hole that will suck you in and slowly destroy EVERYTHING — your motivation, your ambition, your happiness.

The reality is that nothing will change in your lifestyle until you stop making excuses and start taking radical responsibility for your situation.

But to do that, you have to be brave, stare deeply into the metaphorical mirror and study your reflection — imperfections and all.

And there WILL be imperfections — and that’s OKAY.

It’s the way is has to be.

Why?

BECAUSE YOU’RE HUMAN! 

Stop Excusing The Excuses

Imagine the most beautiful forest you can picture. . .

Is it full of perfectly symmetrical trees all lined up in artificial rows?

Of course not.

It’s organic, a little rough around the edges.

That’s what makes it beautiful.

The same goes for you.

Stop blaming others and start accepting your failures and challenges. Start solving own your own problems. Start owning your own mistakes. When you screw up, say: “You know what? I really messed that up. That one’s on me”

When you’ve done something wrong, don’t make excuses; don’t blame your circumstances; blame yourself.

Acknowledge it — “Yep, I’m really bad at X. I need to work on getting better at that.”

But don’t beat yourself up over it.

It NEVER helps because there’s no attempt at analysis or solution making; it’s just destruction.

Make sure that when you’re admitting your shortcomings (we ALL have them), you don’t get stuck in the surprisingly addictive negative loop of regret and depression — life really IS too short

a forest

Suck It Up and Start Exploring

Remember: Everyone makes mistakes. 

Everyone has bits they need to fix.

And you’ll always find a limitless supply of people worse off than you.

So, go ahead and allow yourself to mess up, but this time treat those mess ups as part of the experiment.

Part of the process of analysing, adapting and growing.

It might be scary.

It might be uncomfortable.

It might even hurt your ego (in fact, it will DEFINITELY hurt your ego!).

But suck it up, stop making excuses and find out what the underlying psychology behind all of it really is

Once you stop wasting energy on making excuses, you can start channelling that energy into serious self-improvement and start making things happen.

And THAT’S the point when real transformation begins.

Inspirational Stories

So, how do you stop making excuses and start making the changes you really need in your life?

Well, have a look at what truly successful people do – people who have been incredibly successful AND managed to live wholesome lives.

Read their biographies.

Read about their struggles.

Read about the strategies they used to propel themselves to greatness.

Many of their stories will show how they trained and transformed their mind, so it became an authentic and unstoppable force.

YOURS can, too.

Active Vs Passive

Do you know the one simple thing that all successful people do?

They do SOMETHING.

They take consistent action and move forwards, whether it’s in what they think or in what they do.

They’re ACTIVE not PASSIVE.

They don’t spend their time whining, moping about, making excuses and playing the victim — they take ACTION.

Sometimes they get it wrong, sometimes they get it right.

But at least they start moving.

Move Forward Without Fear

Ask yourself:

If you’re lost in the first and don’t know which way to go, which is a better strategy: Stand there doing nothing and dwell in the depressing fact your completely lost, or start walking?

Well, obviously it’s start walking, right?

But what if you walk in the wrong direction?

Well, you turn around and start walking the other way!

At least you’re doing SOMETHING.

And that’s always better than doing NOTHING.

Most decisions we make in life are not final or unchangeable. So don’t be afraid of getting things wrong.

Instead, be afraid of not getting anywhere at all because you’re too lazy, egotistical or entitled to make a bold move.

3 Key Excuse Busting Strategies

So, here are three things successful people do that you don’t (but should):

1. Start calling yourself out.

Whenever you catch yourself making an excuse, call it out.

Say to yourself: “Ok, I’m making an excuse right now” and at the same time, try to identify the root of the excuse.

It didn’t pop up out of nowhere, although it may seem to you to be automatic and unattached to any particular reason – but there WILL be one.

Your job is to mindful enough to not only spot the excuse-making, but also trace the original cause.

That bit’s hard work, because your ego will often stand in the way and block you from seeing things objectively.

But over time, if you practice consistently, you’ll notice the patterns.

You’ll begin to see the original causes, and you’ll be able to see the excuse emerging in the ether of your mind before it manifests in words.

The first step in the process is to train yourself to be mindful of when that excuse pops up – and before it pops out of your mouth!

Once you train your mind to be on high alert for those elusive excuses, it will start doing a pretty good job of flagging them for you.

The question THEN is, what are you going to DO about it?

If you can notice the thought before it manifests in speech, you’re already starting to win the game.

It’s then up to you to get your ego out of the way and admit to yourself honestly that it’s just an excuse.

When you can do THAT, you’re already have enough momentum AND wisdom in the mind to potentially disarm the excuse-making entirely and take positive action.

2 Be straight with yourself and ask: “What’s the REAL reason for my excuse?”

Dig deep until you unearth the true underlying cause.

Find out what you are afraid of.

Is it people judging you for something you will do?

Is it a fear of taking responsibility for something you forgot to do because you’re not organized enough?

Or is it just laziness, which is a fear of good old fashioned hard work?

All excuses are anchored somehow by fear.

So, analyze the hell out of the excuses you make until you understand precisely why you made them in the first place. 

If you can’t do that, you’ll never find the underlying cause.

And if you never find the underlying cause, you’ll never break the bad habit.

3. Call in reinforcements

one friend coaching another

This is a good idea – as long as you can find the right person to help.

Identify someone who will actually help call you out on your ridiculous excuses — but make sure they’re not someone who’ll become a deranged dictator policing your every move!

After all, you don’t want a self-righteous control-freak raining judgment down on you constantly.

However, you DO need someone willing to compassionately call you out when you start with the excuses.

Having an ‘accountability buddy’ who has the right mix of empathy and courage can provide that external check on your behavior when your mind starts cooking up those dodgy, delusional rationalizations.

They can help you stop them in their tracks when your mind isn’t yet powerful or well-trained enough to do it consistently by itself.

The discomfort of being called out by someone you respect may be just the wake-up kick in the pants you need to break your excuse-making habits.

As I said, though: Just make sure to choose someone you trust to keep it real without going overboard and into constant daily criticism.

Own & Overcome

Making excuses is a natural human behaviour.

But that doesn’t mean it’s a GOOD one.

Making excuses is the same as lying, and lying weakens and pollutes the mind.

If you really want to ‘make it’ and lead a wholesome life in the process, your mind needs to be powerful and wise.

When it’s powerful and wise, it’s free from the shackles of so much nonsense that we allow society to bind it to.

When you finally overcome the fear of facing reality, take ownership of your flaws and failures, learn from them and then build on them in a positive way, you’ll begin to feel that freedom. 

FREEDOM from the incessant need to accumulate things to impress others. . .

FREEDOM from having to look your ‘best self’ all the time on Instagram (or whatever other soul-sapping social media you choose to marinate yourself in). . .

FREEDOM from feeling like you’re constantly in a race with others without really knowing why, where or when it will finish. . .

FREEDOM from the pressure of seeming to have your life together every moment. . .

FREEDOM from the complications and depressing background drone in your life that continually making excuses creates. . .

FREEDOM from the greed, anger and delusion that are driving the shocking spike in depression among industrialised populations in modern times. . .

When you train your mind to eliminate the excuses, you finally have the power to look at yourself from a more objective, honest place.

And THAT’S where personal growth, transformation, and the ability to achieve your goals and dreams REALLY begins.

You’re Already Ready

The truth is, you don’t need my permission or anyone else’s approval to stop making excuses

You don’t need to hire me as your life coach or read any other books. 

Deep down, you already KNOW what you need to do.

You know that the excuses, the rationalizations, the victim mentality — it’s all BS.

It’s a great big lie you tell yourself to stay comfortable, to avoid taking responsibility, to prevent yourself from ever truly growing.

But you’re better than that.

You’re strong enough to look your excuses straight in the eye, call them out for what they are, and make the decision to take full ownership of your life.

It won’t be easy.

The truth is, it will be EXTREMELY hard at times.

There will be many moments when you want to crawl back into your pit of excuses like a bug retreating to a safe dark space. . .

But those hard moments are PRECISELY why you must do this.

Because embracing difficulty is what allows you to build resilience.

And resilience is one of the master keys to making the breakthrough you need to stop making excuses and start really living.

Nike logo

Just Do It

Owning your faults and failures completely and then learning how to be a better person is what allows you to finally make progress.

So, just do it.

Ditch the excuses.

Today. 

Right NOW.

Stop running from yourself.

Look your problems straight in the eye, figure out which ones are under your control to change, and then get started changing them, one solid little step at a time.

The one’s you can’t change?

Well, accept that, stop struggling with them and focus on those you can.

It’s time to stare down your crappy excuses and show them who’s boss.

When you do that, you’ll gradually start growing into the person you deserve to become — and the doors to infinite possibilities will finally open.

0 Comments

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

join our amazing community

Subscribe!

Don’t miss out! Stay up-to-date with with a one-stop subscription.

We’d love for you to join us 🙂

Related Posts

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This